The past one week, a lot had happened. Tears, shove offs, harsh text messages, apologises. All that had above all the pain, brought us closer together with deeper understanding of each other. I shouldn't have done that to her. Wanting to isolate myself. What was I thinking. But, this is the beauty of family. No matter how rotten up you are, they will take you in with the warmest hug, anytime. Because it is true, unconditional love. Her apologising, was the most unexpected and significant thing that she had ever done, which makes me respect her even more at a whole new sky-high level.
I learn not to keep things inside myself. If you have some things to sort out, do it right away. If the person on the other end really matters to you, all the more reason for you to do it. It's stupid to assume and just wait for miracles to happen. You want something, you go get it. No one's gonna do it for you, unless you lack an arm and a leg and what you wish for is only a piece of cheeseburger. Dream on, and your dreams will come crashing down on you when you realise that thing you're hoping for is gone, for-e-ver. I'm doing just this, bit by bit. I know I might not have it but at least, I tried, even though I might screw up for the hundredth time. The only thing that's holding me back is the fear that I would lose it even more. That's old fashion thinking. I seriously do not want to wake up in the middle of the night, thinking furiously about it anymore. Really.
She told me, always be happy and do not let anyone take that away from you. What's most important is you're satisfied. Don't bother about what other people think about you. You know the truth. That is all that matters.
Muffins, cupcakes, whatever you call it, I made for the ETP.
Six hours of sweat, blood and smiles(seriously, there's blood).
Smile till the end :)
"I know what love is. When you find the person you are supposed to love, bells ring and fireworks go off in your head and you can't find words to speak and you think about her all the time. When you find the person you are supposed to love, you will know by staring deeply into her eyes."
-Jacob-
House Rules, Jodi Picoult
