So much for so much

Plans got cancelled because of the rain. Crazy weather. Instead, I had a good time toying with her in the car while stucked in the lovely jam. It's time to get serious soon. Not excited but well, life goes on whichever way. Have a good Halloween and Monday. Lol :).

After the rain comes the beautiful day

So keep your hopes grasped tightly

For there will always be a good one

Stay

And games that never amount

To more than they're meant

Will play themselves out

Splendour

Yesterday was indeed a splendid day. I was busy in the kitchen in the morning(sounds so housewife-y) and at night, the party was at Thatchu's place. Just like good old times. The firecrackers was the highlight. I almost died twice lol. Those boys are violent. Nah, just deaf for five minutes and everything's alright. It was great, laughing and losing ourselves under the drizzles like kids all over again. :)

But, all fun will come to an end at some point. And when that happens, people go jiwang for no reason. It's somehow normal. Next year, everyone will be off overseas and I am here alone, living my life as it is. I'm not saying it's a bad thing but, I don't know, the picture of saying goodbyes and hugging each other at the airport or in a farewell dinner somehow just leaves that longing bittersweet taste under my tongue. You don't see it, but it's there. 

I saw photos, it's funny how they make you smile and cry at the same time. Mostly laughters. Happy weekend ahead. Adios.

Explosions

Happy Deepavali. Diwali vathukal. Happy Lights Day. Today was great. I had three rounds of mutton, muruku, idli, putu mayam and lots of yummy yummy cookies. This is one of the reason why I love being a Malaysian. It's amazing how people from all sorts of backgrounds and have entirely different stories themselves could come together and have a good meal under one roof. We visited one of dad's close friend in Puchong, like every other years. Come to think of it, it has been more than ten years I've been going there for Deepavali. Aunty Indra cooks the best mutton rendang in the world, seriously. The BEST. They are not wealthy people, they're just as ordinary as you and I are but, I think they are one of the most successful people I've ever come across with. Their pictures came out in the Star a couple of days ago and many other newspapers before and even Astro. It is their hardwork and perseverance that makes people look up to them. Sometimes, it is the disability that makes people so strong and courageous in chasing after their dreams. If only we don't need to lose something to gain something. 

Homework. The most dreadful word right now for me. And group work, there's nothing more to say. Bad timing is just it. Everyone's holidaying and seriously just lost the mood entirely. Scary. I'm like freaking out already cause holiday's passing by so soon and I don't wanna have to pack to go back there :(. Yesterday, I slept at 3am, doing irrelevant things; thinking of stuffs, smiling to myself, download loads of random songs. This is how I always waste precious time away so easily. Just now was funny, I had like three group discussions going on on Fb simultaneously and suddenly, on the water rocket side, Lina said, out of frustration, "Why must health science students make water rockets?" and Kam answered, "Cause one day we'll have to shift to outerspace when the earth is doomed and they need pharmacist there too." LMAO. Alright, sweet dreams amigos. Chao.

Fuzzy, just like my mind.

Revelry - Kings of Leon

Mylo Xyloto

What a weekend. Drank so much liquid and kept rushing to the toilet every 15 minutes. Nope, no drug involved. Today's the 24th, memorable day.. Five months :). I went around the house taking snaps of nature and get some fresh air at the same time. I'm bored staying at home for four days already, I need to go somewhere badly. But everyone's busy with college and exams. And it's raining every single day. Cold. Deepavali's on the way, I want muruku, I want mutton curry, I want indian. :D 

Can you see Baby Hopper? 

This photo tells something but I don't know what.

The many-faces me.

Hearts.

Thinking of sky.

Put your arm around my shoulder

And it was as if the room got colder

And we moved closer in together

And started talking about the weather

Lily Allen - Who'd Have Known

Fantastical

This morning, Alene, Emileen, Lina and Jie Ying came down to Klang and we had the Under The Bridge Bak Kut Teh. Haha it was a really fun experience. We kept laughing and laughing, Emileen learned a couple of new words, 'garlic' and 'add soup' in Hokkien. After that, we walked to Bank Islam to get our ATM card done, surprisingly the people worked incredibly fast today. Usually it takes at least an hour to get something done in the bank. Then we walked to Indian Street and had the best cendol and rojak in Klang.

Getting to places on feet was so different. You get to see more things and spend more quality time with the people you're with. We shared our similarities and differences and learn each other's culture a lil' deeper. It's nice to have friends from all over the places. It gives you a reason to travel to some places that you perhaps had never thought of visiting. After getting our stomachs all filled with so much of good stuffs, they had to go back to catch their flights and bus. For the next long sem break, we were like planning to explore the whole of East Malaysia. Seriously, there is like so many of them from Sarawak, and Sarawak people are extremely nice people. I hope the plan works and my parents will give me the green light. Hee. 

This holiday, I will make myself so happy, I swear. Gosh, now 24 hours feels like 64. Have a great weekend, amigos. (:

Just photos.

See You Soon

I'm addicted to their songs. Well, my soul is for sure. I watch Grey's Anatomy and One Tree Hill because of the background songs they play. It suits the mood so well in a weather like this. Everything is just perfect, just lack of a cup of hot-brewed caffeine to keep the eyes wide apart so to enjoy the night a lil' longer. Mmm maybe not tonight, the headache since this afternoon is overpowering me I swear I could fall unconscious anytime while sitting down. This week, I wasn't entirely conscious of what I was doing. Perhaps the assessment, projects and assignments thrown onto us for this week and the coming holiday season had taken up most of my brain's capacity. Our English group got reshuffled again and for every subject, I'm with different groups of people, it's so confusing at times. And it's troublesome, very. Everybody's going back to their hometowns in every single directions, now we're supposed to have discussions over Facebook, which is like so impossible cause we get distracted so easily and really, how is work going to be done with only your fingers moving.

For Physics, we have to make a water rocket each and after the holiday, we'll meet up, test and choose the best rocket to be used on the launch day. Math assignment and project which is more like an exercise on how to use the Microsoft Excel, Chem assignment: gotta make a video on Invisible Ink and lots of other homework. This course is like this, we've got used to it and really, we're all really pushing ourselves like never before. Tomorrow, my class is the only class who doesn't have class cause we requested for our classes to be brought forward. Hallelujah, we get to enjoy the comfort of home sweet home one day earlier. It's nice to be home, it's your real home after all. Somehow, I think, people will still go back from where they come from no matter how far and how long they've been away. Similarly, you will always go back to the people you feel most at home with despite how distant you are physically and how many acquaintances you've met along the journey.

Today is the 100th day since he'd passed on. Every now and then I will try to remind myself all over again about stuffs. And really, it's necessary as we always tend to forget things and underestimate well, life itself. I learn to accept bitter truths, I learn to step over unpleasant thoughts without making judgemental conclusions, I learn to not take too personally the problems I hear cause sometimes I get really emotional about other people's problem, I learn to accept huge differences in others and most importantly, I learn to distinguish people who loves me. Just the other day, my friend and I, we weren't that close and we actually talked for almost three hours. I'm a natural listener, well, it's the least I could do.

Accident

Accident occurs in many forms. Some hurts physically, some hurts emotionally or both but the point is, it leaves a sensation relating to pain somewhere along the process. Today, I wished I had stepped on the brake hard enough, soon enough. I hate this, I hate him having to negotiate with that idiot and at the end, screamed at him out of frustration, mostly caused by me and because he was just so..idiotic. It was such a silly mistake that I can one hundred percent avoid if I were attentive enough, good enough.

It's not gonna bring me down, I kept telling myself. People learn from mistakes, they grow out of pain eventually. But, for me, it's hard. I take things very personally and very seriously at times. She understands and every time things like this happen, she'll be the one lifting up my spirit, lighting up the dying fire in me once more. Well, it isn't too difficult though. All I need is some tissues and then, something nice to indulge in.

Mum and dad had to attend a wedding dinner today. The lil' one and I got into the mood of mischief and experimental, like we used to as young kids. We watched random Youtube videos together. We popped our own popcorns, coated them with caramel and watched a Dota movie he's been asking me to watch since last week in the room, air-conditioned, curtains pulled, all cosy and comfortable. It was quite a touching movie but I didn't feel anything cause the characters are too beastly-like? Haha. Feels so good to be doing all this again, it's like I was eight again. I remember we used to drink tea together after dinner. We'll boil a whole kettle of water and drink till our bladder full and we sweated like mad. Good times :).

"It's okay. You're all that matters to us."

Now it's turning blue

I'm gotta be more cautious with some guys in school lol. One said hello to me all of the sudden out of nowhere today, another kept wanting to take my photo in class and one more, said I'm a nice girl like so many times. That is really weird. Today was okay, just sleepy cause I stayed up late yesterday, searching for a photo I really really liked, and still like :). Sometimes, certain things never really change, regardless of how much time had passed.

"Sometimes I think the human heart is just a simple shelf. There's only so much you can pile onto it before something falls off the edge and you are left to pick up the pieces."

-Emma-

My pants kept dropping today

Hi. Today was a crazy day, bio and english quiz and moral mid-term. Whoever said moral was easy, I guess it's an entirely different story here in this place beside the 'pond'. We had to write essays, explain concepts and apply one theory to answer a case study. Where did all the MCQ questions went?? Down the pond. Just amazing. Haha when I walked out the room, Wei Wen was like, "...worst than bio, read also cannot answer..." That coming from HER. And the guy sitting beside me was the first to hand in the paper. When the lecturer said start, he attacked the paper with ink without mercy. He definitely knew what he was doing. That, was moral.

English was fun. Twas like studying for the family history of every soul in a town. We memorised names and the  questions was like "Eva's husband, the postmaster, the person who runs a coal business, the name called after Steven Adams, the owner of the grocery, the boy who drew for himself and his mom, etc. and of course, university-level-questions" Bio, what more can I say, like that lah. Well, I'm really not complaining or anything. It's just, my habit to reflect on things that happened in a day before I go to bed.

Okay I forgot everything else that I wanted to blog about. Owh this week's english assignment is to search for a song with the theme based on The Lottery and then presentation this Thursday. Anddd, I've chosen Your Love Is A Lie by Simple Plan :). Nostalgic, for some reason. Childhood song lol.

'Cause tonight I'm feeling like an astronaut

Sending SOS from this tiny box

And I lost all signals when I lifted off

Now I'm stuck out here and the world forgot

Can I please come down, cause I'm tired of drifting round and round

I might just end up as a chef.

Loafer

The past two days, I've been eating, slacking and sleeping a lot. Just don't feel like doing anything, or perhaps I can't. Friday, came back from dinner, wanted to read moral but I slept off before 9pm I think, till the next morning. Saturday, I was walking around the house the whole day, searching and looking through stuffs at every corner of the house and at night, slept off when I was just about to read something. Today, after lunch, slept till six something. Something is seriously not right, I know. Maybe it's just the month, the weather, the horoscope, the feng shui or just hormones. *pulls hair* Need chocolates, lots and lots of it.

Haha this evening, I phoned Ms. Bendy and we talked like quite long I think. It's seriously was like two aunties in their late 50s, talking about their lives and life in general. I have beer belly, like seriously. I don't drink that much okay, it's 'hardly', I dislike drinking, I don't drink for no reason, it's like pouring fuel and lighting it up in your system. But sometimes, you know, sometimes, circumstances make people change, even for a split second. And driving, seriously can make me go nuts. This week is gonna be hectic again with quizzes and all. All the best all who's facing their finals soon. Take care of your health no matter what. Aight, gonna pack and brush and sleep. Hopefully a smooth-sail through dreamland tonight. Happy day.

I'm a sensitive. 

Hearing Voices

The past one week, a lot had happened. Tears, shove offs, harsh text messages, apologises. All that had above all the pain, brought us closer together with deeper understanding of each other. I shouldn't have done that to her. Wanting to isolate myself. What was I thinking. But, this is the beauty of family. No matter how rotten up you are, they will take you in with the warmest hug, anytime. Because it is true, unconditional love. Her apologising, was the most unexpected and significant thing that she had ever done, which makes me respect her even more at a whole new sky-high level.

I learn not to keep things inside myself. If you have some things to sort out, do it right away. If the person on the other end really matters to you, all the more reason for you to do it. It's stupid to assume and just wait for miracles to happen. You want something, you go get it. No one's gonna do it for you, unless you lack an arm and a leg and what you wish for is only a piece of cheeseburger. Dream on, and your dreams will come crashing down on you when you realise that thing you're hoping for is gone, for-e-ver. I'm doing just this, bit by bit. I know I might not have it but at least, I tried, even though I might screw up for the hundredth time. The only thing that's holding me back is the fear that I would lose it even more. That's old fashion thinking. I seriously do not want to wake up in the middle of the night, thinking furiously about it anymore. Really. 

She told me, always be happy and do not let anyone take that away from you. What's most important is you're satisfied. Don't bother about what other people think about you. You know the truth. That is all that matters. 

Muffins, cupcakes, whatever you call it, I made for the ETP. 

Six hours of sweat, blood and smiles(seriously, there's blood).

Smile till the end :)

"I know what love is. When you find the person you are supposed to love, bells ring and fireworks go off in your head and you can't find words to speak and you think about her all the time. When you find the person you are supposed to love, you will know by staring deeply into her eyes."

-Jacob-

House Rules, Jodi Picoult